Crab Happle

Crabonious Bumstable-Happle, also known as Crab Happle, late 20s, was about to inherit the 7000 acre estate of Bumstable House, that looks down upon the quaint village of Bumbleberry upon Shaft, until his grandfather developed an OnlyFans obsession and squandered the entire estate’s fortune on Bonny Bustybaps’s private page and also investing a fortune into her $bustybap crypto coin, which plummeted to zero after the 2021 bullrun.

Luckily he salvaged his drumkit before the receivers moved in and started a new life, playing in a local trad jazz band. At one gig, the double bass player died on stage (he was 93) and his bass fell over and smashed Crab on the head, following which he flipped and started smashing the skins like a derranged Keith Moon. Word got round quickly and Crab was recruited by several local punk bands, including a stint with The Rancid Jizzmeisters. It was at one such Jizzmeister gig that Molly Havoc was in the audience, and she wasted no time liberating Crab from the band and placing him into Cinderkillerella.